Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
