He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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