no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize