I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
