If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Randomize
