I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
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