we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
