it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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