I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
