That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
