so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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