my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
