I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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