so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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