That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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