Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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