He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
