the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
