Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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