You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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