he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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