we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
