i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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