his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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