There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
