drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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