I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize