Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
