Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
