So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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