Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
