What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
