Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Someone shattered a urinal.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
