And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
My hand turned me down
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize