She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize
