doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Need sex. Gaining weight.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
