its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
