just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
