There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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