So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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