I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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