I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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