Pappa wants mamma naked
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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