im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
