i just had sex bonerless
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
