textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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