I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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