bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Everything about him screamed your future.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize