Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize