i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You can't just leave with hair like that
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
